There is something definitely disturbing about the way Valentine’s was celebrated this time around. Nothing outwardly discernable, though. Many don’t even realize that there is a crisis happening right under their noses.

Restaurants and bars around the metro were expectedly full to bursting. The motels did the usual brisk business. Malls were predictably decked with the requisite cut-out hearts. Radios blared schmaltz well into the next day. The air was redolent with the cloying scent of roses and it seemed everybody was running on a sugar high because of all the chocolates and candy.

Ok, nothing new there.

But, on the other hand, check out the front page of the Philippine Daily Inquirer yesterday. There was an article that reported: “More Pinoys not happy with love life, poll shows.” According to a study conducted by the Social Weather Station, only 41 percent of Filipino women and 50 percent of men are satisfied with their love lives. That is down 18 percent and 7 percent from last year, respectively.

Over-all, only 46 percent of the adult population are content with their relationships, an appalling 12 percent decline from the results two years ago. But, how about the scores of others who don’t have love lives at all?

Meanwhile, the Lovapalooza 2 held at the Manila Baywalk last Saturday was well-attended but the participants in the lip-locking event were less than half the number that smooched last year.

If this is not enough, how about the pre-Valentine supplement of another major broadsheet which featured an article on the top 10 ways to break up with somebody aside from a host of unorthodox subjects for an occasion that supposedly celebrates love in all its flagrant glory?

Heck, even Cartoon Network ran a “Don’t be my Valentine” special.

The media is often called the “pulse” of the people. So if you see it turning cynical even on exalted topics like Love, you can pretty much determine what the rest of the population is thinking.

* * *

So here I am, wondering: What on earth is going on?

With televisions shows that promise to help people find “The One” while the rest of the world watches, has love become a mere source of entertainment? Has it become commercialized?

With so many marriages and relationships failing, is it still worth to take the risk?

Has love declined into a watered-down version of itself? How did it become this elusive to the point of becoming a mere illusion? How long have people been disenchanted? How many have given up?

* * *

In my family it seems that I am the only one who has not been fortunate in love, well, romantic love at least.

My brother and his wife have been married for almost eight years and show all the signs of being still very much in love. They can’t stand being apart from each other. Heck, whenever they go out, their clothes are color coordinated.

Meanwhile, last Sunday, our parish priest invited all married couples in our community to renew their marriage vows during the celebration of Mass. My mom and dad, who have been married for almost 30 years, were one of those who went. They had bought shiny, new wedding rings to replace the ones they had accidentally lost and placed them on each others’ fingers during the ceremony.

We had lunch afterwards at Dencio’s restaurant, just the three of us. Across the table, my mom was looking as adorable and as a giddily happy as new bride, while my dad had that smug expression of one who had his arm around his greatest treasure. The love that radiated from them wrapped around me like a warm, fuzzy blanket. Just enough to make me forget the cold, empty place beside me.

* * *

Sometimes I wonder why I am alone. Why haven’t I met the guy that I could love with the same kind of soul-wrenching passion my mom and dad have for each other?

I remember the line spoken by one of the characters in the film Magnolia. He said: “I have so much love to give but I don’t know where to put it.” This is so me.

My friends often wonder about the same thing. They see me as one of the most loving and giving person they have ever met. They say that the guy that I would give my heart to will be so lucky.

Oh, I’ve given my heart away quite a few times already but it was always returned to me with a little scar or two. So for now, I am keeping it.

It’s not saying though that I want for companionship and affection from other people. In fact, I’m practically overflowing with it, thanks to my family and friends.

On the other hand, there are so many people around me that have yet to feel loved. What if God’s plan for me is not to focus on one person but to reach out to as many people that I could touch? What if my purpose in life is to teach others the kind of sincere, nurturing relationship one person can have with another?

It wouldn’t be bad then, but it would be so lonely.

What an irony this life is.